Christianity and Homophobia
Jan 13
Watch the video completely through before you comment or make any conclusions. Okay, since you have done that, lets talk.
The video had me tear up. Literally tearing up. I think it is the perfect song with the perfect video and I don’t know if you can read it, but at the end there is some caption in the video and it talks about bullying and so forth especially as it relates to homosexuality and what happened in New Jersey with the suicide of the young man who was secretly recorded by his roommate.
Let me first define homophobia. Homophobia is not acknowledging that homosexuality is sin, no more than acknowledging that heterosexuality amongst those who have not made a convenant with God is sin. Homophobia is not speaking clearly what the bible says about homosexuality and preaching the Gospel to encourage those who are involved in it to seek God for forgiveness. What Homophobia is, is the demeaning response to homosexuality in a way that robs the person of their humanity, takes away rights given to heterosexuals who are in sin, and even becoming either verbally or physically abusive against those who are homosexual. This includes even the attempt to isolate them or withhold God’s love from them.
Marsha and Julius Erving III have done an excellent job with depicting how often times people respond to people who have a same sex orientation. I don’t know if there has been a more touching video I have seen with my own eyes. I was immediately moved with compassion while watching this. I was also moved with conviction as I have allowed “gay jokes” to hit my ears without an immediate rebuke. These things are harmful and hurtful but most of all evil. Yep evil.
Let me explain something here. The obligation to be gentle, loving, kind, patient, compassionate, gracious, and giving, does not somehow stop when it comes to homosexuality. We still bear the obligation of Grace, the grace our master has called us to and most of all the grace we have experienced through the power of the Gospel. Calling people fags, gays, dikes, sissies, punks, pound cakes, or any other slur should NEVER BE NAMED AMONG BELIEVERS!!!!!!!!! I do mean never.
As Christians we are to fight for the rights of all people, not just people we like. No one should be on the receiving end of some demeaning term from a Christian. And I would definitely call someones salvation into question if they exhibited hatred expressed in violence against someone. God who could have crushed us, who should have beat us then hung us on the cross and then sent us to hell extends His love and grace to us in a way that is unimaginable. Yet to see “christians” involved in verbal abuse and even worse physical abuse has to make me wonder if they have ever experienced God’s regenerating power.
Here is my challenge. If you use such words, stop. If you know of someone who is homosexual and you refuse to extend God’s love, repent (which means change) and apologize to them. Our job is to love the sinner in a way that causes them to fall to their knees before a holy God. If you are around people who use such words or express hatred, tell them to stop, just like you would if they were using a racial slur or exhibiting racial hate. I am not saying that homosexuality and race our the same, I am saying that our response to hatred against a certain people group should be the same.
We have an obligation to bear Christ’s love to a dark and cold world. This doesn’t mean we don’t call sin, sin and hold those who name the name of Christ responsible for upright living. However, it does mean that the commands to be loving, gracious, kind, gentle, refrain from violence, be compassionate and so forth is to be the fruit we display as those who have been called out of darkness.
Amen. That’s the truth.
Your words and sentiments are true. I think homophobia is one of the reasons that the church has not been more successful in addressing this issue. We definitely treat it different than any other sin. Those who make derogatory remarks and conduct themselves in a homophobic manner ought to be ashamed of themselves.
I actually had a close friend of mine who had been working in the ministry for years and was a pastor, step down and come out of the closet to me. I have done my best to be of support to him and a good friend during a time in which he has gone so far to consider committing suicide.
But the issue that I have and I have posed this question to my friend because of remarks he made, is why must our combat of homophobia include the acceptance of the behavior. It is the one sin, not that seeks to be condoned. It seems to happen in almost every instance. Even your example a video that puts a homosexual relationship in a favorable light and concludes with her asking us to accept this alternative lifestyle. Those in that community seem to equate calling it sin with homophobia.
I’m not saying I have answers but I find it a very difficult thing to approach because the call is to accept, to tolerate, and there is no other sin, even if we don’t treat those who do it as harshly that people make the attempt to do that with. You would don’t see people asking us to accept adultery, to condone fornication, or drug abuse. Even if we do by our actions those we are never told that in order to truly love someone that is caught in those situations that we must accept that sin.
Larry,
You are correct. But if we were to put on their shoes they feel that they were born that way. And brother I don’t believe they are wrong.
I hold to the philosophy that someone could be born attracted to the opposite sex and my heart goes out to them because brother, sexuality and romantic emotion is a hard thing to suppress. They are born with this bent torwards the same sex. Since we are taught that God is good and doesn’t make mistakes then that means since I was born this way I have no control. I think we are to be compassionate and listen to this more than we have.
Next we can’t accept it. Just like I couldn’t accept someone who may be attracted to women and may have a bent towards hyper sexuality. God has called us to one partner of the opposite sex and thats final; however, a person who wants to express themselves both romantically and sexually but may have that attraction towards the same person can’t and that is where my heart goes out.
Finally when they do do that, my understanding should be that they have given in to sin and I am to be compassionate to the sinner as Christ was compassionate to me. This is where this post is coming from.
Concerning homosexuality, I think alot of people confuse showing affection for being “gay”—and that may have alot to do with why guys battle often with same sex attraction. I know that many households involving a lack of godly physical touch often were noted by those in same sex relationships as a reason why they struggled..
If someone is starved of food, they may end up being so desperate that they’ll eat from the trash can…as hunger has no conscience. And even though the food is bad, at least it satisfies. Likewise, in our culture, we’ve so been lacking in the area of knowing how to have masculine touch—-be it due to thinking stereotypes of men are what God considers godly (i.e. “Real men aren’t affectionate”, “Real men don’t hug..”, “Real men don’t cry..”, etc) or thinking that “MACHO” is true manhood—-that others will go for what’s immediately available within the “homosexual” community.
To be real, where I’m coming from, All of this is said coming from someone who has not only had friends and known folks who’ve dealt with homosexuality/fallen into (and hence experienced the dark side of it—depression, suicide, anger, disease, etc) but also from someone who has himself dealt with the issue of same-sex attraction numerous times. I believe that there’s freedom from the issue indeed…….but nothing short of a battle & one many people often don’t know how to effectively fight in…..
James Dobson and others with “Focus On The Family” have had some of the best points in years when it comes to addressing same-sex relationships and what’s termed as “Gay Christian” theology—as said best by Family.org in one of their articles entitled Pro-Gay Revisionist Theology
Whenever it comes to others saying “Are people born gay and loving others of the same sex? or “Its possible for two gay indivudals to truly love one another, thus making their relationship legitimate”, according to the scriptures, how is LOVE defined? That is and will always be the central issue that must be addressed—including addressing the reality of differing kinds of love, whether it be a wordly love (as with Solomon with those the Lord did not desire for Him to be with and yet he held “fast to them in love” at the expense of the larger love that God required of Him and that best reflected His standards–with the consequences being God being misrepresented and immorality being presented to the people, 1 Kings 11:1-3 /1 Kings 11) or a love based on the Lord’s full standards…
On a side note, as much as others try to paint Jesus as this person of extreme bravado and those in the scriptures (aka: Paul, John, etc) as these “manly” men who were never emotional except when it came to wanting to live radical for Christ, I must say that its interesting to see how PHYSICAL those in the scriptures were.
In the OT, kissing was normal between males (Genesis 27:26-28, Genesis 45:14-16, Genesis 48:9-11, Genesis 50:1-3, Exodus 4:26-28, Exodus 18:6-8 , 1 Samuel 10:1-3, 2 Samuel 19:38-40 , Psalm 2:11-12, etc ). And with Christ, has anyone ever considered why it was significant that Christ was betrayed by Judas with a Kiss ( Matthew 26:47-49, Matthew 26:48-50, Mark 14:43-45, Mark 14:44-46 , Luke 7:44-46, Luke 22:47-49, Acts 20:36-38 )? For it wasn’t just a quick peck on the cheek, but a sign of deep friendship back in the day….especially if considering the Greek wording/context of kiss….and in light of how Christ called Judas “Friend” afterward ( Matthew 26:49-51 ) and asked “You betray the Son of Man with a Kiss?”
Outside, John was literally on the bossum of Christ, laid up on him…..and of course, there’s the classic command to “greet each other with a holy kiss” that we often forget in our homophobic culture. The issue of “holy KISSES” is interesting to study since the church at Rome was instructed not only to greet one another, but explicitly—“with a holy kiss.” You find This command not only once, but 5 times in the New Testament (1 Corinthians 16:20; 2 Corinthians 13:12; 1 Thessalonians 5:26 and 1 Peter 5:14.)…..& if you’ve ever been to Europe, they seem to have no problem expressing it in what seems to be a most GODLY WAY.
The same thing goes for Brazilian culture when it comes to the ways males interact with older male relatives (i.e. grandfathers, uncles, etc)—as kissing ALONGSIDE hugging are considered to be normal amongst them as ways of showing affection….and counter to how conservative we are in the States, to avoid doing so would be considered insulting
With the Holy Kiss subject, many commentators believe that this was either a greeting performed in coordination with the liturgical rites of the church (i.e., the Lord’s Supper) or it was simply a standard greeting performed at normal greeting times. Favoring the latter is the point that in the Jewish and Greco-Roman world, a kiss was used as “a form of social respect” used to greet other parties. [Dunn, Romans commentary, 898; Black, 212].
As it stands, I find it interesting that even today, in many non-western cultures that do not share “our obsession with the sexual”, greeting one another with a kiss is still a common practice. Throughout Russia, Greece, Romania, and the Middle East, it is quite common to see Orthodox Christians greet each other with a kiss. Of course, its not a big kiss on the lips, mind you, but a light kiss on each cheek…..the equivalent of a handshake – with nothing sexual about it.
If aware of what goes down in the Mafia where the Godfather kisses his agents/servants (with it being understood that resisting is an insult leading to death), it makes even more sense as to why seeing kissing between males on certain things can be quite “macho”
Likewise, throughout many regions of Africa, it is very common for people of the same sex (both Christians and non-Christians) to hold hands. Again, there’s nothing sexual about it since its just a way of showing friendship. It’s really a shame that people in this country are so obsessed with sex that they assume that every other culture in the world (and throughout history) is as well.
Something else worth noting is that with the “greeting each other with a holy kiss”, this was a greeting performed in coordination with the liturgical rites of the church (i.e., the Lord’s Supper), that, at least in the Orthodox Church, is still a part of the Liturgy. In the ancient Church, the “Kiss of Peace” took place among all the faithful of the congregation. Again, it consisted of a light kiss on each cheek. In the Orthodox Church today, the Kiss of Peace only occurs between the clergy during the Liturgy in 99% of the churches, although there are a few that still practice it throughout the entire congregation.
I’ve experienced the “holy kiss” deal myself…both in my time within Eastern Christian circles and in other places. One time I experienced it was kind of awkward when it happened. It was with someone who was the leader of a social justice agency…and the man was an ex-convict who had a RADICAL EXPERIENCE in PRISION WITH CHRIST, & did HOMELESS MINISTRY. Imagine a bulky, 6.5 FOOT, TATOOED DUDE coming up to give you a hug and kiss on a check…..& when trying to resist, having him tell you, “Brah, don’t play like that…..Bible says I gots to do this.” (which is what happened.
Holy Kisses aside, not many guys are even comfortable giving things such as hugs, crying, and being affectionate to one another…..& what’s saddening is that the Bible doesn’t seem to support the mentality ONE BIT, yet entire sermons have been made in defense saying “That’s just how men are.” I contend that just how men have been raised to think.
Look at David & Jonathan friendship (to the point of ENORMOUS SELF-SACRIFICE/DEDICATION & affection….even to the point of, hugging & KISSING, (I Samuel 18:1-4, I Samuel 20:1-18). Look at the characteristics of Colossians 3:12-13 , I Peter 3:8).
Though I’ve been blessed to have this type of friendships in my life, I’m sadden for how many men have literally be ROBBED of this type of INTIMACY & have been trained to see it as UN-MASCULINE.
I’m steppping off my soapbox now…….